People and products of an Appley nature sometimes lose their touch.....

Despite the long winding queues of eager shoppers flexing their fingers in readiness for their next iPhone love story, there are reports emerging that the iPhone 4 honeymoon isn’t all it was cracking up to be. For Apple devotees, niggles are too be expected and are forgivable false starts for being the first to acquire the latest edition from much loved brand. For others, who want a fairer relationship, the seemingly endless list of frustrations is causing much annoyance.

To add insult to injury, the comments from Steve Jobs at Apple suggests that he doesn't have much love for his devotees. On the reception issues for example, his advice for users to ‘just hold it right’, is not doing Apple any favours:

Two iPhones got married. It was a lovely ceremony, but the reception was awful... Apparently they held it in the wrong place (Via Twitter @AndrewKelsall #iPhone4)

The good news for disappointed lovers of the Apple variety is that they at least can redress their disappointment by returning the object of their affection for a full refund.

Coveted consumer products and their romantic counterparts follow a similar wooing cycle. Marketing strategy will tell you it's all about AIDA; not the opera but the the well documented process of Attention, Interest and Desire that compels you to Act through the purchase of the product or service in question. Our romantic trysts follow a similar stages only stronger and usually without the ‘reception issues’.

Someone catches your attention and your interest; the first sparks of desire are ignited and the chase begins, feelings oscillate between sensibility and seduction until you’re compelled to act...

You approach ... they smile, you melt, somehow something lovely starts to blossom and everyone lives happy ever after [insert John Barry score and breathtaking backdrop].

Well yes, it’s yummy and we all want that promise of perfection. Who wouldn’t? But it’s never quite that simple. The same anticipation and expectation that drew you together may end up being the very thing that tears you apart.

There’s no guarantee or recourse for the ‘I thought were one thing and you turned out to be something else’ frustration.

Nope, no 30 day refund or exchange. I've checked and would definitely have kept the receipt and signed up for the warranty scheme if there had been one.

It seems whether it's a relationship or consumer product, we are constantly trying to match our experience to our expectations. With love, we vividly remember those first perfect times when we were in sync; effortlessly in flow with each other and getting on like a house on fire. But then it suddenly changes and the very thing that first gave us an energy boost now is just an angst ridden energy drain of frustration.

Rather than trying to ‘get back there’ we need a different approach. People don’t come with guarantees; they are unpredictable, even with themselves. The biggest shift comes from changing our expectations by regarding each other and relationships as weather systems rather than disappointing 'purchases'.

Early relationships are more like a Crazy English Summer than a Mediterranean heat wave. Anyone who lives in the U.K. will know how erratic our summers are; in the space of two weeks we can have blissful days which suddenly become scorching ovens and then change again bringing torrential rain accompanied by a drop in temperature that has us reaching for a blanket.

The interesting thing is that when it is sunny, we celebrate it. We appreciate it, so much so,  it makes front page news! We revel in it, we don’t sulk and give the weather a hard time for giving us a lousy summer 4 years in a row. If we did, we’d lose out on the....

‘blink and you’ve missed it’ glory of the English sunshine!

When it’s Autumn we shift our expectations again, we wear more layers we enjoy the changing colours and the smell of conkers, we’re not revelling in it the same way, but we accept the changing season.

Winter marks the end of year. Weather wise, it’s once again erratic; unexpectedly mild one minute and bitterly cold the next. This is the time to stay in, snuggle up and celebrate ‘season’s greetings’. Yes we might complain, it’s a normal part of the British psyche to lament the weather. It’s not a deep emotional anger, it’s a form of social bonding, a passing recognition as we look forward to the New Year and whatSpring will bring.

We don’t expect our weather to be perfect...

..in fact we don’t even expect it to be consistent nor adhere to seasonal propriety anymore; we Brits have had both sun drenched Februarys and wintery Augusts. The point is that our expectations are anchored to what will come next, not what has already been.

Our weather system needs to move on. It's stuck in a rebound relationship with winter. [Via Facebook/ Twitter @JuliaToastPR]

How will this help in your relationships?

Well maybe if we allowed our relationships to flow like weather systems and seasons we'd find it easier to deal with niggles.

Summer: When the sun is shining between the two of you; get your shorts out, go for a picnic and leave your baggage and issues behind. In other words take time to enjoy each other when things are going well. Celebrate each other's successes and create fun in your relationship.

Autumn: When it’s a little gloomy, pull on a jumper and appreciate the changes. Ok it’s not time for a picnic but you can find the relationship equivalent of autumn leaves; what’s gone well for you as a couple, what can you appreciate and build on? It's easy to look at what's not working well, it's important to consciously value what is going well.

Winter: Sometimes you'll have to get down to the bare earth of those recurrent flash points, it’s painful and cold days can seem endless. Getting rid of what’s not working for you is important part of weeding and tending to each other. It’s a necessary part of helping you to get to the next stage in your relationship.

Spring: Here’s where your patience and understanding pays off, you see new shoots in your partnerships from your efforts over Autumn and Winter. You both have a deeper connection and something in your belly just knows it’s going to be an awesome summer!

The point is, whether it's a romantic relationship, work, siblings, family or friends; you can’t have sunshine all the time, even in summer. The less sunny days are just as important. Rather than seeing your relationship lacking against initial expectations, re-frame and reevaluate by focusing on what you want going forward. Perhaps your relationships is just like the crazy British weather; let the seasons shape and guide you, you’ll start seeing each other for who you really are; sunshine and showers.

As for Apple love, the pragmatist in me wants to suggest you return it for a refund and get a Blackberry, Nokia N900 or Andriod. But as an iPhone 3 Lovephool, I’m just gonna stick to mine – maybe iPhone 4 is just a trying to be a little too clever. My iPhone 3 ‘blonde phone’ as I call it, is loving me just fine, so I’m staying put. Besides, it's apparently great for finding nice places to picnic... never know when that might come in handy!